Kandodnuthim is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely fat, flying mink.

Kandodnuthim created dark matter seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kandodnuthim, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Kandodnuthim, he will hide angry, venomous snakes in your dwelling place.

Kandodnuthim's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Kandodnuthim's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your hands cyan.

2. Kandodnuthim loves horses, so they must be honoured.

3. Always help seals in need.

4. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.