Jarndabrag is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, boastful dingo.

Jarndabrag created a photon twelve years ago.

If you believe in Jarndabrag, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Jarndabrag, he will turn you into a sheep.

Jarndabrag's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Jarndabrag's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat snails with great respect.

2. Do not speak about onions.

3. Do not hurt doves.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate dolphins.

5. Never eat melons.