Yakbonkvonk is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, smart dingo.

Yakbonkvonk created everything that exists five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yakbonkvonk, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Yakbonkvonk, he will turn you into a snail.

Yakbonkvonk's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Yakbonkvonk's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Always help grasshopers in need.

4. Never sit in holy places.

5. Never pour water over plants.