Aflunvilfem is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, humane troll.

Aflunvilfem created Europe eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Aflunvilfem, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Aflunvilfem, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Aflunvilfem's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Aflunvilfem's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate capybaras.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.