Vonkhonpas is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, sage lion.

Vonkhonpas created a strange quark four years ago.

If you believe in Vonkhonpas, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Vonkhonpas, she will turn you into a dog.

Vonkhonpas' most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Vonkhonpas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never think ill of sick geese.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Worship no other gods but Vonkhonpas.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate foxes.