Tabvabbem is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, kind dryad.

Tabvabbem created a charm quark three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tabvabbem, it will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Tabvabbem, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Tabvabbem's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Tabvabbem's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bark.

2. Do not dye your hair purple.

3. Never wear kilts.

4. Do not speak about grapes.

5. Never play with disobedient children.