Jatbafxuck is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, intelligent manatee.

Jatbafxuck created a strange quark two years ago.

If you believe in Jatbafxuck, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Jatbafxuck, she will boil you in a big pot.

Jatbafxuck's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Jatbafxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed pineapples to frogs while wearing orange boots.

2. Never talk about ants.

3. Do not dye your hair pink.

4. Always treat gulls with great respect.

5. Never play with disobedient children.