Mobkonfun is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, self-assured pig.

Mobkonfun created tapeworms nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mobkonfun, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Mobkonfun, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Mobkonfun's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Mobkonfun's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Pray towards the west.

3. Do not dye your hair yellow.

4. Never write about asteroids.

5. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.