Beg Spagfasfag is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, tranquil sheep.

Beg Spagfasfag created carbon five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Beg Spagfasfag, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Beg Spagfasfag, it will turn you into a plant.

Beg Spagfasfag's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Beg Spagfasfag's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never paint your neck violet.

4. You must love Beg Spagfasfag.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.