Fonvilflanlan is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, sage wolf.

Fonvilflanlan created a bottom quark three billion years ago.

If you believe in Fonvilflanlan, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Fonvilflanlan, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Fonvilflanlan's most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Fonvilflanlan's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Always make sure there are no gulls in a building before entering it.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate otters.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.