Pinhotged is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, witless whale.

Pinhotged created the cosmos eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pinhotged, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Pinhotged, it will turn you into a rock.

Pinhotged's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Pinhotged's Holy Commandments

1. Do not cook food in pots.

2. Never paint your head cyan.

3. Do not speak about spinach.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Do not listen to music.