Jamripbop is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, resourceful slug.

Jamripbop created bats seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jamripbop, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Jamripbop, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Jamripbop's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Jamripbop's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bread.

2. Do not trade with those who eat bananas.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Do not kill cats.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.