Quillgomcip is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, omnipotent aardvark.

Quillgomcip created an electron three million years ago.

If you believe in Quillgomcip, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Quillgomcip, it will turn you into a slug.

Quillgomcip's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Quillgomcip's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Always treat tapirs with great respect.

4. Do not take Quillgomcip's name in vain.

5. Never talk about black holes.