Jamrigciss is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, all-powerful chicken.

Jamrigciss created dark matter eight million years ago.

If you believe in Jamrigciss, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Jamrigciss, it will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Jamrigciss' most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Jamrigciss' Holy Commandments

1. Always wear magenta.

2. Never think about moons.

3. Never wear shoes.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Do not kill whales.