Cussyakdin is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, smart goblin.

Cussyakdin created the solar system nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cussyakdin, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Cussyakdin, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Cussyakdin's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Cussyakdin's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat tortoises with great respect.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never feed melons to tapirs while wearing orange shirts.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Never wear blue tights.