Padmegmad is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, fast giraffe.

Padmegmad created silver seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Padmegmad, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Padmegmad, it will try to impress you with trees.

Padmegmad's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Padmegmad's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from red otters for they are unholy.

2. Do not speak about tomatoes.

3. Never write about gravity.

4. You must never eat onions.

5. Put Padmegmad first in all things.