Watjigflan is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, conceited human.

Watjigflan created Europe four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Watjigflan, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Watjigflan, he will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Watjigflan's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Watjigflan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never talk about comets.

4. Run away if nine turtles approach from the north.

5. Watjigflan loves manatees, so they must be respected.