Kimbadstrag is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, resourceful gorilla.

Kimbadstrag created light nine million years ago.

If you believe in Kimbadstrag, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Kimbadstrag, she will destroy your home solar system.

Kimbadstrag's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Kimbadstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never write about stars.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Kimbadstrag.

5. Always help mice in need.