Gonxucpad Nurtfitstrag is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, two-faced parrot.

Gonxucpad Nurtfitstrag created the planet Earth four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Gonxucpad Nurtfitstrag, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Gonxucpad Nurtfitstrag, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Gonxucpad Nurtfitstrag's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Gonxucpad Nurtfitstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about gravity.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Retreat if six doves approach from the south.

4. Do not skip in public.

5. Never eat green fruit.