Tikkadtim is a god.

It takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, flying goose.

Tikkadtim created the Sun four billion years ago.

If you believe in Tikkadtim, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Tikkadtim, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Tikkadtim's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Tikkadtim's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never wear blue scarves.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.