Hug Nakbutveg is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, dishonest seal.

Hug Nakbutveg created the universe six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hug Nakbutveg, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Hug Nakbutveg, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Hug Nakbutveg's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Hug Nakbutveg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never write about cell theory.

4. Do not kill birds.

5. Always look after injured ducks.