Metkadcib is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, dishonest snail.

Metkadcib created the planet Mars seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Metkadcib, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Metkadcib, it will destroy your home planet.

Metkadcib's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Metkadcib's Holy Commandments

1. Tortoises are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Never run in the presence of manatees.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

4. Always help turtles.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.