Japbenmit is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, tiresome guinea pig.

Japbenmit created energy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Japbenmit, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Japbenmit, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Japbenmit's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Japbenmit's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of nickel.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Never talk about capybaras.