Rillnurtyarp is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, unsympathetic scorpion.

Rillnurtyarp created Africa seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Rillnurtyarp, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Rillnurtyarp, he will strike you with lightening.

Rillnurtyarp's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Rillnurtyarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Do not hurt goats.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not stand on grass.