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She takes the form of a very long, staggering gnu.

Volcamcuntipdudrul Kikbimfob created the Sun four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Volcamcuntipdudrul Kikbimfob, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Volcamcuntipdudrul Kikbimfob, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

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Volcamcuntipdudrul Kikbimfob's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into mauve rooms.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never hurt aardvarks.

4. Never think ill of sick tortoises.

5. Always help great tits in need.