Fetflagzig Sadbimcembemcarfatgom is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, cheerful cow.

Fetflagzig Sadbimcembemcarfatgom created an electron three million years ago.

If you believe in Fetflagzig Sadbimcembemcarfatgom, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fetflagzig Sadbimcembemcarfatgom, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Fetflagzig Sadbimcembemcarfatgom's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Fetflagzig Sadbimcembemcarfatgom's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Fetflagzig Sadbimcembemcarfatgom.

2. Never go into magenta rooms.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Fetflagzig Sadbimcembemcarfatgom must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never write about the strong nuclear force.