Homladyarpcud is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, almighty deer.

Homladyarpcud created the Black Eye Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Homladyarpcud, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Homladyarpcud, it will turn you into a goat.

Homladyarpcud's most sacred site is Hetta in Finland.

Homladyarpcud's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Homladyarpcud.

3. You must love Homladyarpcud.

4. Never hurt tapirs.

5. Erect eight silver sculptures of Homladyarpcud on top of important buildings.