Wottinkem Mantitfon is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, almighty centipede.

Wottinkem Mantitfon created the Cigar Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Wottinkem Mantitfon, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Wottinkem Mantitfon, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Wottinkem Mantitfon's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Wottinkem Mantitfon's Holy Commandments

1. Always help bats in need.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Never eat parsnips.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never talk about manatees.