Futloopnil is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, wise meerkat.

Futloopnil created the Black Eye Galaxy six million years ago.

If you believe in Futloopnil, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Futloopnil, he will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Futloopnil's most sacred site is Goat's Hole Cave in England.

Futloopnil's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from indigo gulls, for they are unholy.

2. Futloopnil loves sheep, so they must be honoured.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Erect six copper sculptures of Futloopnil on top of important buildings.