Gedmetmip is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, capable cat.

Gedmetmip created gold four million years ago.

If you believe in Gedmetmip, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Gedmetmip, it will not care.

Gedmetmip's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Gedmetmip's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Always wear magenta.

5. Gedmetmip must be the most important thing in your life.