Nibparkhom Vonrapgum is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, unthinking pigeon.

Nibparkhom Vonrapgum created the planet Saturn two billion years ago.

If you believe in Nibparkhom Vonrapgum, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Nibparkhom Vonrapgum, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Nibparkhom Vonrapgum's most sacred site is Polydrosos in Greece.

Nibparkhom Vonrapgum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Never sing near shrews.

3. Run away if eight mites approach from the west.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not kill sharks.