Yarlmetvolhig Femafcid is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, strong crocodile.

Yarlmetvolhig Femafcid created Africa eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yarlmetvolhig Femafcid, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Yarlmetvolhig Femafcid, he will turn you into a puffin.

Yarlmetvolhig Femafcid's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Yarlmetvolhig Femafcid's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

3. Do not take Yarlmetvolhig Femafcid's name in vain.

4. Never paint your back cyan.

5. You must never eat peas.