Ponnarhenpakbusbepbum is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, humorless mink.

Ponnarhenpakbusbepbum created the planet Mars seven million years ago.

If you believe in Ponnarhenpakbusbepbum, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Ponnarhenpakbusbepbum, she will turn you into a rock.

Ponnarhenpakbusbepbum's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Ponnarhenpakbusbepbum's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Never look in ponds.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Never mention whales.

5. Never think about comets.