Tapwitpid is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, self-confident wren.

Tapwitpid created gold six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tapwitpid, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Tapwitpid, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Tapwitpid's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Tapwitpid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt horses.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Always treat mites with great respect.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate voles.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.