Tom is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, slow centaur.

Tom created the cosmos four million years ago.

If you believe in Tom, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Tom, she will be very unhappy.

Tom's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Tom's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Worship no other gods but Tom.

5. Never talk about porpoises.