Jannurlmeg Dussrignur is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, awesome dryad.

Jannurlmeg Dussrignur created a Higgs boson nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Jannurlmeg Dussrignur, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Jannurlmeg Dussrignur, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Jannurlmeg Dussrignur's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Jannurlmeg Dussrignur's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention dogs.

2. Erect five silver sculptures of Jannurlmeg Dussrignur on top of important buildings.

3. Always make sure there are no mice in a building before entering it.

4. Jannurlmeg Dussrignur loves ducks, so they must be respected.

5. You must love Jannurlmeg Dussrignur.