Honbapzod is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, omniscient giraffe.

Honbapzod created bats six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Honbapzod, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Honbapzod, he will destroy your home solar system.

Honbapzod's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Honbapzod's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat apples.

2. Hide if five dolphins approach from the east.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Always pray immersed in water.

5. Never write about moons.