Bassflowbet is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, moody swallow.

Bassflowbet created matter three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bassflowbet, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Bassflowbet, he will destroy your favourite star.

Bassflowbet's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Bassflowbet's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate nematodes.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.

5. Do not take Bassflowbet's name in vain.
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