Gilkom is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, happy gerbil.

Gilkom created the Whirlpool Galaxy three million years ago.

If you believe in Gilkom, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Gilkom, he will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Gilkom's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Gilkom's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from magenta dolphins for they are unholy.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Always make sure there are no otters in a room before entering it.

4. Never paint your arms green.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.