Listcarnart is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, all-knowing crocodile.

Listcarnart created the planet Saturn two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Listcarnart, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Listcarnart, he will turn you into a tree.

Listcarnart's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Listcarnart's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Listcarnart loves goats, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Do not drink water in mauve rooms.

5. Always help sick gulls.