Femtargsag is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, ill-tempered alligator.

Femtargsag created viruses nine million years ago.

If you believe in Femtargsag, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Femtargsag, he will not invite you to parties.

Femtargsag's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Femtargsag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat peas.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate gulls.

3. Never talk about comets.

4. Do not wear gray clothing.

5. Never think about gravity.