Gongentalkipwabgigmantap is a god.

She takes the form of a large, selfish rat.

Gongentalkipwabgigmantap created the Whirlpool Galaxy seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Gongentalkipwabgigmantap, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Gongentalkipwabgigmantap, she will curse you with boils.

Gongentalkipwabgigmantap's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Gongentalkipwabgigmantap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill ants.

2. Do not speak about bread.

3. You must pray to Gongentalkipwabgigmantap nine times a day.

4. Never talk about amino acids.

5. Do not commit murder.