Gungenbed is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, annoying hare.

Gungenbed created the cosmos nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Gungenbed, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Gungenbed, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Gungenbed's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Gungenbed's Holy Commandments

1. Always help tortoises in need.

2. Never wear boots.

3. Always obey Gungenbed's priests.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Always pray immersed in water.