Budbonkxen is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, slow zebra.

Budbonkxen created carbon eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Budbonkxen, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Budbonkxen, it will make you grow a tail.

Budbonkxen's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Budbonkxen's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from orange mites, for they are unholy.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never sing near birds.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never feed figs to hamsters while wearing black stockings.