Minvedlipgupzimsawtip Bosslabhig is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, slow giraffe.

Minvedlipgupzimsawtip Bosslabhig created everything that exists five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Minvedlipgupzimsawtip Bosslabhig, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Minvedlipgupzimsawtip Bosslabhig, she will turn you into a rat.

Minvedlipgupzimsawtip Bosslabhig's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Minvedlipgupzimsawtip Bosslabhig's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Always wear yellow.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Retreat if six voles approach from the north.