Ruttyarptit Flowcusskam is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, idiotic jellyfish.

Ruttyarptit Flowcusskam created vertebrates four billion years ago.

If you believe in Ruttyarptit Flowcusskam, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Ruttyarptit Flowcusskam, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Ruttyarptit Flowcusskam's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Ruttyarptit Flowcusskam's Holy Commandments

1. Put Ruttyarptit Flowcusskam first in all things.

2. Never think ill of sick hamsters.

3. Do not take Ruttyarptit Flowcusskam's name in vain.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate tapirs.

5. Respect your elders.