Tarflamdim is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, unfair ferret.

Tarflamdim created the planet Saturn seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Tarflamdim, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Tarflamdim, it will refuse to believe in you.

Tarflamdim's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Tarflamdim's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Tarflamdim on top of all buildings.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Never eat bark.

5. Never look at planets.