Vidsawtar is a god.

He takes the form of a large, dishonest snake.

Vidsawtar created the planet Saturn two million years ago.

If you believe in Vidsawtar, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Vidsawtar, he will send minions to preach to you.

Vidsawtar's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Vidsawtar's Holy Commandments

1. Vidsawtar loves ducks, so they must be respected.

2. Never feed bread to moths while wearing blue scarves.

3. Never talk about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Vidsawtar.

5. Always wear mauve.