Vogwonfem Rawgodhenfat Arpbiflarg is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, emotional gnu.

Vogwonfem Rawgodhenfat Arpbiflarg created the Milkyway nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vogwonfem Rawgodhenfat Arpbiflarg, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Vogwonfem Rawgodhenfat Arpbiflarg, he will turn you into a worm.

Vogwonfem Rawgodhenfat Arpbiflarg's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Vogwonfem Rawgodhenfat Arpbiflarg's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if five moths approach from the east.

2. Do not trade with those who eat cucumbers.

3. Never skip near hamsters.

4. Do not wear turquoise clothing.

5. Never go into green rooms.