Vadbumbarnlag Kindubfarnshav is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, merciless squirrel.

Vadbumbarnlag Kindubfarnshav created the Sombrero Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vadbumbarnlag Kindubfarnshav, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Vadbumbarnlag Kindubfarnshav, it will curse you with boils.

Vadbumbarnlag Kindubfarnshav's most sacred site is Chettipet in India.

Vadbumbarnlag Kindubfarnshav's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce near ducks.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Vadbumbarnlag Kindubfarnshav loves manatees, so they must be respected.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.